Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
