batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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