Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
