I'm eating all of the evidence.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I think your dad took our porno
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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