i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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