im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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