google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
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