So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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