Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
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