i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
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My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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