I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
And then he peed in my hair
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