All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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