I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
