Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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