Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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