I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
