This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
