Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
