Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
