im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
