i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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