shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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