Porn is love you can see.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
