when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
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He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
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I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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