it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I am naked and annoyed.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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