Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize
