we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize