Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
