Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
