you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
