there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
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