apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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