he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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