And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize