At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Jerry, you need to find god
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
How's work?
Spinning.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
