jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
