Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
