Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize