so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
