who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
My feet surprised me
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize