My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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