So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
