Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
