No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
