What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
