D3 body, D1 cock
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize