Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
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