so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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