just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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