You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
